Recently I’ve felt an awful lot like some kind of work-ogre who scares away all of my time. Hours, minutes and seconds flee at my advance, meaning I never seem to have anything to spare for the projects I actually enjoy.
When I say work is taking up too much of my time, I’m not kidding – I keep having to fly to London for meetings and faffing about trying to set up new processes for my department – and I really don’t want to.
So I should do less work right – maybe scale back at the day job? Yeah, well there’s the rub, I really, really want to, but I’ve never been one of those writers who can shrug off the expectations of the non-writing world. All that means is that I’ve found myself on a career path and I’m now scared to step off it. I’m fighting for a promotion and a pay rise, and it looks possible – but sometimes I think that I’m actually fighting for something that’s detrimental to the life I want to live. (That’s one where I write lots and lots :))
My long term plan is – and has for ages been – to go part time at work and spend the remaining days writing. The thing is, I’m waiting for two things; enough seniority at work to make it feasible, and some kind of sign from the writing world that it wouldn’t be a waste of time. The curse of being too sensible… I could be waiting forever at this rate.
I know and read about a lot of writers who take the plunge and write full time, or hold down undemanding jobs to maximise their writing time – and I’m jealous, even though I’m pathologically scared of putting all my eggs in one basket. If you’ve quit your day job, how has it impacted your writing life? I’d love to know.
Oh well, nothing’s going to change this week – just stay out of my time-wrecking path if you want to get anything done!
The right time will never come. You just have to do it.
http://www.zenfamilyhabits.net/2010/02/there-will-never-be-a-good-time/
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I like your sentiment Ols, but I’m too much of a dyed in the wool cynic to be able to to cope with the post.
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Lynsey, I can relate to what you’re going through. I’ve never wanted to be a lawyer, but once the school was over, everyone kept telling me that I had to be one because I finished the school and you know… what else was I supposed to do? The problem was I worked 14 hours a day, it was a consuming job, I never had any time to read let alone write and I was simply miserable. One day I got home from work, called my boss and told him that I was not coming tomorrow. I have no idea how I built up the courage but I’m glad I did. I was also waiting for some sigh from the writing world to show me that I wasn’t about to make the biggest mistake of my life, and to tell you the truth I’m still not quiet sure if I did or didn’t… All I know is I was miserable back than and I am happy now…
I’m sure when the time comes, you’ll take the next step and put those eggs in that basket 🙂
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14 hours a day! no wonder you couldn’t wait to get out and back to a world where you can read and write and have a little space to think for yourself.
I’m sure you haven’t made the biggest mistake of your life – it certainly doesn’t seem that way.
I have grand schemes that could leave me with the best of both worlds if they work, but they will be a long time in the making and I suppose my post shows how frustrated I am in the meantime.
Well done for calling your boss… I suspected I’d have wimped out and sent an email instead 😉
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